Treacherous Deceptions
by Halawen
Summary: Clare's cancer is in remission so she should be feeling good and enjoying her senior year but she's showing signs of being sick again. Is her cancer back? Or maybe it's her maintenance therapy meds & their side effects. A/U short story drama, possible trigger warnings. Also staring Owen, Adam, Drew and Dallas.
1. Every Smile that You Give

**Welcome to my new short story!**

**Legal: I own nothing but the idea. This story is dramatic and contains possible trigger warnings so read with caution.**

**Important to know before reading:**

***Eli and Clare get back together at prom and did have sex**

***She became sick with cancer and Eli came home to take care of her**

***Clare went into remission a couple weeks before school resumed and Eli went home while she was put on maintenance therapy chemo meds**

***Drew was elected student council president and asks Clare to be VP**

***Alli graduated early and is gone at MIT**

***Owen is going to U of T and working at DeGrassi part time as assistant football coach**

***Adam didn't die and is the social chair on student council**

***Eli is rooming with Lenore at NYU which Clare is unaware of**

***Jake is away at school**

***Drew is still engaged to Bianca**

**Ch.1 Every Smile that You Give **

**(CLARE)**

"We also need to talk about the budget this afternoon and whether we're holding something for Halloween or Thanksgiving. I think we should do a Halloween dance, put that in there to vote on a dance," Drew instructs as he paces the student council office.

It's Thursday morning before school has even started and we're working on the agenda for this afternoon's meeting. By which I mean Drew is dictating as he paces around the table and I'm typing. Well I'm typing when I can pay attention but my head is pounding, I rub my temples and take another sip of the protein shake my mom made me for breakfast. She makes one for me every morning, calls it a super smoothie or something and says I need to build my immune system after the cancer and the chemo. I've been officially in remission for just over a month now and my mom has done everything to keep it that way. She has me on a strict diet and gives me these smoothies for breakfast every day that she packs with things like kale, beets and blueberries.

"Clare you're not typing," Drew admonishes as he stops his pacing suddenly. "Are you okay?"

"Sorry it's just my head is pounding, I'll put in to vote on a Thanksgiving feast," I tell him and start typing.

"No I said a Halloween dance and you just typed gibberish," Drew informs me and kneels down next to me turning my face to look at him. "You look a little pale, we're ending the meeting I'll finish the agenda at lunch," Drew says turning my laptop to him so he can save it and send it to himself to work on later.

"I'm okay I just need something for my head," I argue.

"We'll swing by the nurse to get you something for your head but we're still ending the meeting early I need my veep fresh," Drew states.

He closes my laptop putting it in my backpack and I stand up, we go to the nurse's office and tell her I have a terrible headache. She gives me some acetaminophen, which she watches me take, and then we walk to our lockers while I continue sipping at my breakfast shake. We find Adam and Dallas at their lockers and since I've finished my shake I rinse out the reusable cup in the drinking fountain.

"That was a quick meeting," Adam remarks as I walk across the hall to my locker.

"Clare has a headache so I ended early, it must be rally bad because she could barely concentrate," Drew tells them while I put my cup in my locker and get out some books.

"I got something from the nurse hopefully it will take effect soon," I comment about to take out my physics book and suddenly my arm cramps up while my fingers feel numb. I rub my hand and start shaking it, Dallas gives me a look.

"You okay?" He asks.

"My arm cramped up and my fingers feel numb," I tell them and they all have their brows furrowed. I can't explain it myself, it's not like I fell asleep on the arm and woke up with it like this I was just moving it and using it. Dallas comes over and starts rubbing my arm and hand, after a minute it relaxes and I let out a relieved breath. "Thanks," I say to Dallas, clenching and unclenching my fist just to feel my fingers again and get the blood flowing once more.

"No problem but why'd your arm cramp?" Dallas asks and I just shake my head.

"Hey high school losers," Owen teases coming down the hall. Owen is attending U of T and working part time at DeGrassi as an assistant football coach, he gets school credit for his job since he is going for his coaching certificate.

"Hey you took a job here you're not exactly out either," Dallas retorts.

"Owen you know any reason that Clare's arm would randomly cramp up while she was taking books from her locker?" Adam inquires and Owen looks at me.

"That's weird, but you could have accidently overextended a muscle in your arm, those text books are pretty heavy," Owen replies.

"Yeah that's probably it," I nod taking my chemo meds from my locker and my water bottle.

"You know," Adam comments while I swallow my medication, "it could be the chemo meds causing it."

"It's possible," I nod putting it all back in my locker, "they have about three dozen warnings and side effects."

"When's your next appointment?" Adam questions.

"In a little over a week, if I feel any worse side effects I'll call my doctor I can deal with an occasional cramp," I reply.

Owen hangs out with us until he has to leave for his first class of the day at U of T and the rest of the day is normal. By second period my headache is gone and by lunch I'm feeling a lot better, I get a little dizzy at lunch but I also didn't eat. Of course after I got dizzy Adam made sure I ate some yogurt with a banana. By student council I was feeling pretty good, I was having trouble concentrating though. Owen gave me a ride home since he was done with football practice at the same time as we finished the meeting, Mom was home when I got there.

"Hi honey how was school?" Mom asks as she hugs me.

"It was fine," I reply.

"Well sit down dinners all ready," Mom says.

"I'm not really hungry," I shake my head.

"You need to eat Clare, at least have a little vegetables and a small piece of fish for the protein omega-3 fatty acids," Mom insists.

"Okay just a little but then I need to go do my homework," I tell her sitting at the table.

Mom gives me a plate and kisses the top of my head, she never fussed or hovered like this before, then again she never had the fear that her child might die of cancer before either. Glen's working to finish a job by the deadline so he hasn't been home for dinner in over a week. He usually gets in about 7 or 8 and leaves by 6 the next morning. After I eat all that I can and Mom gives me my chemo meds I go up to my room and start doing homework. I get everything for my writers craft class done and answer some questions in my physics book. I start to work on my native studies homework but I forget what I'm doing and end up staring at the computer screen. When my video chat program rings I jump slightly, Eli's picture is there and I hit accept.

"Hey it's good to hear from you," I smile at my boyfriend.

"I thought we were going to video chat at seven tonight, you were supposed to call me after dinner I called you when I didn't hear from you," he tells me with his forehead wrinkled.

"Sorry I guess I forgot, I had a terrible headache this morning I think it just killed my brain power for the day," I apologize.

"Probably because you have to do all the thinking for Drew," Eli chortles in a sardonic tone.

"Eli he's not that dumb and when he saw I wasn't feeling well he ended the meeting. Can we maybe rain check I think I just need some sleep," I request.

"Yeah sure get some sleep Edwards, I love you," Eli says.

"I love you too," I smile and close my laptop.

When I go out to the washroom to start getting ready for bed I hear Glen is home. I really am tired and fall asleep almost as soon as I crawl into bed. Waking up at 5:30 Friday morning without an alarm but I did sleep for ten hours straight. I start getting ready for school and Glen is awake, he comes out of his room and smiles at me before I go into the washroom and he goes downstairs.

"You're up early," Glen comments when I come down ready for school.

"Yeah I went to bed really early and I woke up by myself at 5:30 but it's probably a good thing since I have homework to finish," I respond.

"I'm about to leave if you'd like a lift to school," Glen offers.

"Great thanks," I smile grabbing my bag and going out to his truck with him.

Glen drops me at school and I unlock the door then I have to run to Simpson's office to put in the alarm code. Once the alarm is off I return to the front to lock up, usually Simpson or a teacher arrives by 6:30 or 7 and Coach Armstrong is usually here early and often with Owen. I head to the student council office to do my homework and then I'll be there when Drew comes to do the agenda for the meeting this afternoon. Before I start working I text Eli to ask if he wants to chat tonight but when I don't hear back from him right away I put my phone in my backpack. I feel much better this morning and I'm nearly done with my homework when Drew, Adam and Dallas walk in.

"You got here early," Dallas yawns.

"I had to finish some homework," I reply.

"Are you ready to do the agenda? I figured since it is Friday we'd hold the meeting at lunch so people could have their Friday afternoon to themselves," Drew comments.

"Meaning you want to go to the football game," I comment.

"Only working together a month and already she already knows me so well," Drew grins hugging me from the side.

"No it's just 'cause I tell her all your secrets," Adam teases in a snarky tone.

Drew grimaces at his brother and we start working on agenda, we plan to keep it short since we only get an hour for lunch. We're nearly done when Adam nods to the door and I look over to see my mom coming in.

"You left so early Clare I wasn't able to make you protein shake for breakfast, you have to keep up your strength," Mom says giving me the cup and kissing my cheek.

"Thanks Mom," I smile, "so what did you put in this one?"

"It's mostly banana, peanut butter, honey, some yogurt and some supplements to help build your immune system again. With cold and flu season coming up I don't want to risk you being sick," Mom tells me.

"Thanks mom but you really shouldn't have gone through all the trouble, I could have gotten something from the caf," I point out.

"It was no trouble and anyway you still need to eat healthy don't forget what the doctor's said. Well I have to run to work, have a good day Honey, bye Adam," Mom waves and leaves.

"Your mom seems nice," Dallas comments when she's gone and Adam scoffs.

"She's usually not but ever since my cancer she's been a lot more involved," I explain.

"Yeah well seeing your kid sick and facing the possibility that they might die would probably make anyone a more involved parent," Dallas remarks while I take a sip of the shake.

"It's actually pretty good today, usually all I taste is the really strong vegetables she puts in," I muse aloud before I go back to typing.

We finish the agenda while sip at my shake, I e-mail the agenda to everyone on student council and close my laptop. While the guys gather their stuff I finish my shake and go rinse the cup in the washroom just across from the student council office. I start to walk back to the student council office shaking the excess water from the cup and suddenly get dizzy; I become off balance, put my hand to my head and feel myself falling toward the floor as my leg muscles become weak. I get caught by a strong pair of arms just inches before I hit the floor with my butt.

"Whoa you okay?" Owen questions as he helps me to stand, I hear the pounding of running feet and I know it's Adam, Drew and Dallas.

"Yeah I think so I just got dizzy," I tell Owen but I'm still feeling woozy and I realize I'm gripping onto Owen's shirt.

"Maybe you should lie down on the sofa in student council office," Adam suggests and I nod. I start to take a step but Owen seems to decide it's better just to pick me up and carry me in. He lays me on the sofa and the boys all crowd around and peer down at me.

"I'll grab an ice pack from the phys. Ed. office, Dallas get her some water," Owen commands.

Dallas nods and they both rush out of student council office. Adam sits on the sofa near my feet and takes my hand while Drew just looks at me, his face twisted with worry.

"I'm okay I just got a little dizzy," I tell them.

"No you got a lot dizzy, we thought you were going to pass out and you would have hit the floor if Owen hadn't been there," Drew argues.

"I really think you need to talk to your doctor about the meds you're on, because if it's not your medication then…" Adam stops before he says it and I nod.

"Then what?" Drew asks not knowing what Adam meant.

"Then it might be that the cancer is back," I explain to Drew.

"Oh," Drew says slowly just as the door opens and Dallas comes in. He opens a water bottle and I sit up a little to take a couple sips.

"Clare what happened?!" Jenna exclaims bursting in with Owen, Connor, Becky and Luke following her.

"Here," Owen says putting an ice pack wrapped in a paper towel on my forehead.

"She got dizzy and nearly passed out, she wasn't feeling well yesterday either, she's been tired a lot. I think it's her chemo medications because they have a lot of side effects, at least I hope it's her medications," Adam tells them and I hear the concern in his voice.

"I have an appointment a week from Monday I'll ask my doctor about it then, honestly I'm okay I just got a little dizzy," I persist and try to sit up but Owen puts a hand on my shoulder and pushes me back to the sofa.

"No you stay here, stay until after first period I'm a teacher and I tell you to stay," Owen asserts.

"You're not a teacher, you're a student assistant coach but he is right, I'll stay with you and we can tell Miss Dawes after class," Adam says just as the bell rings.

"Alright I gotta get to school, take it easy for a while Clare," Owen says again and then waves before he leaves.

"We'll tell Miss Dawes where you two are, it's on the way to our fashion class," Jenna offers.

Adam stays with me for all of first period, after about fifteen minutes I sit up, I still feel kind of weak but I feel better. I keep sipping at the water and ask Adam to get my chemo meds from my locker. He runs out to get them and runs back, I take them and then we just sit quietly, Adam plays a game on his phone and I watch him. After sitting a few minutes my toes feel like they've fallen asleep so I wiggle them in my shoes until the feel better. When the bell rings for second period Adam helps me up and we walk to physics class.

"Miss Dawes said you two would catch up real quick on Monday and she hopes you're feeling better, are you feeling better?" Jenna asks as soon as we get into class.

"Yeah I feel better Jenna," I nod.

I feel okay all through physics class even though I still feel a little weak and woozy, my hand cramps up about halfway through and my leg falls asleep for a few minutes. It's all so minor that I barely pay attention but Adam keeps looking at me. After physics it's not only lunch but student council is meeting so Adam and I walk to the student council office.

"Did you bring any lunch?" Adam asks me.

"Honestly I didn't think about this morning," I reply.

"Stay here I'll run to the caf, you need to eat something," Adam comments as Jenna and Connor come in.

Dallas and Drew come a couple minutes later and finally Adam comes in with lunch for him and an apple and sandwich for me. I'm okay for the meeting and as the day goes on I begin to feel better.

"You want to come over, stay the night? I'm sure Mom will let you," Adam offers as we meet up after school.

"You're definitely coming over, want to watch the football game first?" Drew asks coming over with Dallas.

I shrug and follow the Torres brothers to the football field. Owen is out there talking with Armstrong and looking at a clipboard, when he sees us he waves. I decide I better call Mom before the game starts and it gets too loud. I call her cell and leave a message that I'm watching the game and then sleeping at Jenna's, she'd never agree to me sleeping at Adam's. The game is pretty entertaining but we lose by seven points.

"We would have won if we were still on the team," Drew says to Owen when he joins us after the game.

"Damn right, gotta whip these guys into shape," Owen sort of barks and I shake my head at the outpouring of testosterone.

"Clare's coming over you want to hang out for a while?" Drew offers to Owen.

"Sure see you guys at your place after I help clean up and help coach yell at the team," Owen comments and runs off toward the locker room.

The rest of us go to Drew's car and I ride in the back with Adam. I check my phone while we're driving but I still haven't heard from Eli. We go in through the basement and I walk upstairs with Adam to let the Torres parents know that I'm here.

"Hey Mom can Clare sleep over?" Adam requests.

"I suppose so, you can take Drew's room and he can sleep on the sofa downstairs," Audra says.

"Aw man there will be a hot girl in my bed tonight and I don't even get to sleep in it with her," Drew whines coming upstairs.

"I don't think my boyfriend or your fiancé would like it if we did," I quip back.

"True Bianca would kill us and Eli would go even crazier, I'll take the sofa we should probably change my sheets though," Drew remarks.

"Oh gross," I gag making a face.

"Owen's coming over too but just to hang out for a while, can we order pizza for dinner we're starved," Drew requests.

"Why don't we just start charging admission," Omar comments as he comes downstairs.

"Alright order pizza but stay in the basement and keep quiet some of us can't sleep in tomorrow. And Drew change your sheets now before you get too tired so Clare doesn't have to sleep on your dirty sheets," Audra tells him.

Drew runs upstairs to change his sheets while Adam and I go downstairs and get a movie cued up. Owen arrives before Drew comes back downstairs; when he does come downstairs he has blankets and a pillow. Drew orders pizza telling them to come to the basement door and when he's off the phone we watch the movie until the pizza guy knocks on the door. Drew and Owen get up to get the pizza while we get plates and drinks. Owen hangs out until almost two in the morning and then he goes home. I go up to Drew's room to find clean sheets and Adam gives me something to sleep in. I have a terrible time getting to sleep, my extremities keep having that pins and needles feeling and feeling numb and then my thumb is twitching randomly. I finally fall asleep a little after five in the morning but my sleep is disturbed by odd dreams.

**(OWEN)**

It's late Saturday morning, very nearly Saturday afternoon in fact, and I've only been awake for about twenty minutes, but Mom is making me drive Maya and Tris to Miles' house. Maya slept over last night and Miles apparently called and invited them to a pool party today. I was barely awake and was chugging down the coffee I'd picked up as the mindless chatter in the back seat was driving me crazy. That is until they say something that catches my attention.

"Oh crap do you think Clare knows?" My brother exclaims.

"No I doubt it," Maya shakes her head.

"What? Do you think Clare knows what?" I question looking at them in my rear view mirror.

"There's a picture on Eli's facerange of him making out with some girl," Maya tells me.

"You're fucking kidding me!" I growl.

"Nope and he looks pretty into it," Tris says showing me his phone and the picture.

"That bastard I'm going to kill him!"

I drive a little faster and drop them off at the Hollingsworth estate, then I drive to Drew's place. Drew and Dallas are on the sofa watching the game and eating cereal, they wave at me when I come in.

"Hey Owen," Drew greets me.

"Hey where's Clare?" I inquire.

"Still sleeping in my bed, you want to go wake Goldilocks, my parents aren't home but Clare might kill you," Drew snickers at his own joke but I'm not in the mood.

"No I don't want to wake her for this but I'm hanging out until she does get up," I reply sitting on the sofa.

"Don't want to wake Clare for what?" Adam questions appearing on the stairs, I didn't even hear him coming down.

"Eli cheated on her," I inform them.

"Seriously?!" Dallas comments in a dubious tone.

"Yeah and the evidence is on his facerange page," I reply.

Adam opens his laptop on the coffee table and turns it on; when it's booted up he goes directly to facerange and to Eli's page. Not only do I see the picture that Tris and Maya showed me in the car but several more, each progressively worse until a picture of them in a bed and obviously about to have sex.

"Shit Eli why would you be such an idiot!" Adam scolds the Eli on the computer screen.

"What a prick!" Dallas exclaims.

"Clare doesn't need this, she's already been feeling lousy and now Eli's cheating on her. He came and nursed her through cancer but he's gone at school for a month and now he's cheating on her," Drew shakes his head.

"I know but we have to tell her, lying to her will be worse and it's only a matter of time before Jenna or Alli see it and tell her themselves. Clare's in the shower, she'll be down when she's out and we have to tell her," Adam says but with a heavy sigh as he sinks back on the sofa.

The four of us sit there and stare mindlessly at the TV until we hear the basement door from the kitchen open and Clare comes downstairs. We all look over at her and she freezes at the bottom of the stairs.

"What?" She queries pinching her eyebrows together.

"How do you feel?" Adam asks.

"Best I've felt in days," she smiles.

"That won't last long," Dallas comments, Adam and I elbow him at the same time.

"There's something you need to see," Adam tells her pointing to his laptop.

Clare walks over standing in front of Drew to see the screen, when she sees the pictures her hands go up tenting over her moth in shock. Clare's eyes go wide, she takes a big gasp and her eyes fill with tears. She begins to fall back and sink down to the sofa, Drew moves over so she doesn't end up on his lap. For a few minutes Clare just sits there staring in hurt astonishment at the pictures on screen, a small timeline of her boyfriend cheating on her. Finally Adam closes the laptop and Clare leaps up running upstairs again. All four of us follow her, she runs back into Drew's room and slams the door, we hear buttons on a cell phone being pressed.

"ELI YOU CHEATED ON ME! I MISSED ONE VIDEO CHAT SO YOU WENT OUT AND CHEATED ON ME!" She screams with anguish and anger into the phone.

"I think we better give her some time, let's get back downstairs," Adam says and we nod going slowly back to the basement but we can still hear Clare yelling.

We wait downstairs for over an hour before Clare comes down again, she's still clutching her phone tightly. Her face this mottled mix of sorrow, wounded distress, and extreme ire.

"I broke up with him, he tried to tell me he was drunk and it will never happen again but he did it once and I can never trust him again. I told him I never wanted to see him again and that I don't want any contact from him anymore," she tells us sitting on the sofa and curling her legs up.

Adam hugs her and Drew pats her back, she wipes away a few tears but she looks resolute and I'm sure she's better off without Eli. She puts her head on Adam's shoulder and when her phone rings she declines the call. I notice her calf muscle is twitching and she stretches out her leg, it's still twitching and now she looks uncomfortable. Clare's cell rings again and again she declines the call, her calf muscle is still twitching and she starts rubbing it to make it stop. When her cell rings a third time in ten seconds I take it from her, confirming it's Eli before I answer.

"Listen you two timing psycho prick don't you ever call her again, if I find out you called her again I will come to New York and snap your tiny little neck," I inform Eli and then hang up.

"Thanks Owen," Clare smiles at me.

"No problem," I grin moving over to sit at the end of the sofa. I lift her leg and put on my lap rubbing her muscle and feeling the twitch. It's odd, not like a muscle cramp exactly, but her muscles feel weak and yet stiff. "Does your leg do this a lot?" I inquire.

"No not really but my muscles have been twitching a lot lately or cramping up," she replies which I find odd.

After a few minutes her muscle stops twitching and she sits up, Adam says she should eat Clare says she's not hungry after arguing with Eli. She watches the game with us but she's not really paying attention to it. Adam does get her to eat a little lunch however but she's pretty silent all day. A little after four her phone rings again, I get ready to drive to New York and break Eli but Clare says it's her mom.

"Mom wants me home for dinner," she says after hanging up.

"I'll take you I have to get home anyway," I offer and she smiles.

"You have to be home on a Saturday night?" Drew questions.

"Who said anything about going home I got a date," I grin.

"With who?" Dallas questions.

"Like I'm going to tell you and have you ruin it," I shoot back.

We say goodbye, Adam tells Clare he'll call her later, she goes upstairs to get her backpack and then we leave. We drive to her house in silence and when I park out front I see a car and Glen's truck.

"Hey if Eli calls back or e-mails or anything then let me know," I assert and she smiles before getting out of my car. I watch her go inside and then drive home to get ready for my date.

**(CLARE)**

"Oh good you're home, come sit down for dinner," Mom says pulling out my chair. I set down my backpack and sit down saying hi to Glen while Mom fixes my plate. "I made vegetable lasagna and kale salad," Mom tells me setting the plate in front of me.

"Smells great," I smile and take a bite. "I broke up with Eli after finding out he cheated on me last night," I enlighten them before Eli decides to call the house.

"I'm sorry Clare," Glen says sympathetically.

"That's terrible, he cheated on you really? After coming home to nurse you through cancer, that is just terrible," Mom comments shaking her head. "Kelly Hightower from church came by today, she brought flowers and asked how you were doing with the treatment. She hoped to see you in church tomorrow. Don't forget to take your chemo meds after dinner honey," Mom reminds me and I nod.

Mom fills up the rest of the dinner conversation talking about church and the church social in a few weeks. Then Glen says that Jake called and gives us a recap of their conversation. As soon as I'm done eating Mom fetches my meds for me and I swallow them before going upstairs with my backpack. Sitting down at my desk I open my laptop to e-mail Alli and Jenna about me and Eli, the laptop is booting up and I start to feel sick. I send out a quick e-mail to both of them and lay down on my bed. I feel dizzy again, my hands and feet feel numb and I get a terrible headache.

"Honey I was just thinking," Mom says opening my door but stops when she sees me curled up in bed. "Clare sweetie what's wrong?" She asks coming over.

"I'm not feeling well," I tell her.

"Is it your stomach, is dinner not sitting well?" Mom inquires.

"No my head hurts," I reply.

"I'll get you a cold compress for your head, the doctor said you shouldn't have too many pain relievers with your chemo meds," Mom tells me and leaves the room. Mom comes back putting the cold compress on my head and takes off my shoes.

"I don't think I want any dinner, I just want to lie down," I tell Mom.

"Sweetie we already had dinner," Mom replies.

"We did? Can I have some water?" I request.

"Sure Honey I'll be right back, maybe it's best if you stay from church tomorrow, I'll stay with you," Mom says and I hear her leave the room. She returns with a glass of water and I try to sit up to drink it but it's like my muscles aren't working. Mom helps me up and I take some sips of water, I feel dizzy and weak so I lie back down again. I feel awful and I wish I knew why, when I hear my phone ringing I reach for it. "No you just rest honey try and get some sleep," Mom insists and I hear her getting my phone. "Hello Adam I'm sorry Clare isn't feeling well, you can see her tomorrow if she's feeling better," Mom tells Adam before hanging up.

"Mom," I say almost in a whisper.

"Yes honey?"

"I felm…flis…slen…" I'm trying to speak but none of the words are coming out right. I know what I want to say but when I try to make the words they come out wrong. I feel like an infant learning to talk. I can't communicate with my mom and so I start crying in frustration.

**Update Thursday October 23****rd**** from around here and including more with Owen, Adam, Drew and Clare's mystery illness gets worse.**


	2. When I Thought You Might be Dying

**I have posted my entire holiday writing schedule, November through January, on the DeGrassi Saviors website and it's even in a **_**schmancy**_** calendar format making it easy to read and what you have to look forward to so check that out. Everything is subject to change of course, if I become ill or something but if there is a change I will let you know as soon as possible. I'll be posting which one shots will be done for one shot week in January as soon as they have been decided on.**

**Head to the DeGrassi Savior's site and tomfeltonlover1991's page to take her survey about what you'd like to see in a Camaya story.**

**Please remember that there will be no weekend stories this week. I will post a one shot tomorrow but I have friends visiting this weekend so neither Dangerous Game or Ghosts of Who We Were will be posted. Both stories will resume the following weekend.**

**Ch. 2 When I Thought You Might be Dying**

**(ADAM)**

I barely slept last night and yet I wake up early on Sunday morning. I call Clare's cell but she doesn't answer, it's seven so she could be getting ready for church or she could still be sleeping since she wasn't feeling well last night. I want to believe that she's getting ready for church but the sinking feeling in my stomach tells me that she's not. I go down to the living room and of course my parents are awake.

"Adam you're awake early for a weekend son," Dad says looking up from his paper.

"I know Clare wasn't feeling well last night and I'm worried," I tell them taking a cup of coffee, a bowl and a spoon for cereal. We keep milk and cereal downstairs because Drew, Dallas and I almost always eat in the basement. Dallas can sleep through anything so I don't worry about waking him. I sit on the sofa and watch TV while eating and calling Clare every ten minutes. When I finish eating it finally occurs to me to call Clare's house, they shouldn't have left for church just yet.

"Hello?" Glen answers.

"Hi Glen it's Adam, I've been trying to get a hold of Clare but she's not answering her cell."

"She went to the emergency room last night and they checked her into the hospital. I think they're keeping her for a day or so. I was about to leave to pick up Helen for church," Glen informs me.

"She's in the hospital?! Can I go see her? Is she okay?" I ask in a panic.

"I'll inform the doctors you're coming and you can stay with her while we're in church I'm sure she'd like that. I think she's improved since last night but they don't know what's wrong with her and they're running a lot of tests," Glen informs me.

He tells me her room number and hangs up, I thought watching her go through cancer would be the worst thing but watching her suffer from some mystery illness is worse. I drop my bowl in the sink and Dallas sleepily opens his curtain.

"Why the hell are you up so early?" He gripes.

"Clare went to the emergency room last night and they're keeping her in the hospital for a day or more. They have no idea what's wrong with her they're running a bunch of tests. I'm going to the hospital to see her," I enlighten Dallas.

"I'll throw on some clothes and come with you," Dallas says.

"Clare's in the hospital, Dallas and I are going to see her, I'll ask Drew if he wants to go too," I inform my parents rushing into the kitchen.

"Oh dear is she alright?" Mom questions.

"They don't know," I sigh before running upstairs into Drew's room and shake my brother to which he replies by groaning and batting me away. "Clare went to the emergency room last night she's being kept and they have no idea what's wrong with her so they're running a lot of tests. Dallas and I are going down there are you coming?"

"I'm up, be ready in five," Drew says hopping out of bed.

I quickly dress in jeans and a hoodie, when I come downstairs Drew and Dallas are ready. Drew drives and I'm worried the whole way, when we park at the hospital I see Owen's here.

"Dallas called, is she okay?" Owen questions when I get out of the car.

"Glen said she was improving but they have no idea what's wrong," I reply and we walk inside. I know her room number so everyone follows me. Glen and Helen must have already left because Clare's alone in her room. She's awake and looking at her breakfast with disgust. "How do you feel?" I ask her and she looks up at us. As soon as she sees us she grabs her red wig from the stand and puts it on.

"Okay I guess, my head hurts a little, I'm not very hungry and I feel pretty weak but at least I can talk now," she replies.

"You lost your voice?" Dallas asks while I sit on the edge of Clare's bed and the other three sit in chairs.

"No I had aphasia, I was talking but the words I wanted to say and the words that were coming out were different. I couldn't communicate; I couldn't remember things and after I coughed up blood my mom called 911. I don't remember much after the ambulance came. I woke up this morning and the doctor said they were running some tests but they believe it's my chemo medication so they're going to change my medications. The doctor is worried about aplastic anemia but if the tests come back negative for that I'll be released tomorrow," she tells me and I go pale.

"Aplastic anemia," I breathe out horrified at this thought.

"What is that?" Owen asks.

"It would mean my body isn't producing blood cells any longer, it's sometimes a side effect of chemo but it can sometimes occur with the maintenance medications as well," Clare explains.

"It can also be deadly," I inform them.

"What else did the doctor say?" Owen inquires after a few moments of worried silence.

"Not much only that they think it's the medications, they're switching my medications, running some tests and they'll keep me overnight for observation," she tells us pushing away her breakfast tray. I'm worried about her and search for something to say but someone else enters the room before I can a man maybe in his early to mid-twenties, he wears an EMT uniform and Clare smiles brightly upon seeing him.

"Sean it was you, I thought I was hallucinating last night," Clare comments.

"Cameron, from army to EMT," Owen remarks getting up to shake his hand so they obviously know each other.

"Guys this is Sean Cameron, he was one of the EMTs that responded to my house last night. He knew my sister a little and me when I was younger. Sean this is my best friend Adam, his brother Drew, and that's Dallas and apparently you know Owen," Clare introduces us all.

"Yeah Sean and I spent some time in the ravine together," Owen nods.

"How do you feel?" Sean questions.

"Better, I haven't coughed up blood again and I can speak actual words," Clare replies.

"Yes you are, that's good hearing you speak nonsense last night was scary and not the way I wanted to see you again," Sean tells her.

"I wasn't aware that you did want to see me again," Clare responds.

"Honestly neither was I until I saw you last night," he says and Clare smiles, blushing and biting her lip. "I should go, I just came off a twelve hour shift but I wanted to see if you were okay. I heard they're keeping you overnight I'll come back later," he tells her and waves to us as he leaves.

"He seemed nice if not a little old for you," Dallas comments.

"He's only…" Clare starts and then bites her lip again, "he was just checking in on me it means nothing."

"Right, I'll lecture you on it when you're out of the hospital and we know what's wrong," I reply with a sardonic smile.

"Sean's a good guy I'll fill you guys in later," Owen comments.

"That should be an interesting conversation," Clare says rolling her eyes.

"Your room is very full this morning and I see that you didn't eat your breakfast," a doctor remarks coming in the room.

"Not hungry," Clare shakes her head.

"Well I have some good news, your blood test came back and we can rule out aplastic anemia," the doctor says and we all breathe a sigh of relief.

"So it's just her medications then?" I ask the doctor.

"Well right now that's the working theory, nothing stands out and we have to go by process of elimination. I've spoken with Clare's oncologist and we're changing out her medications for different ones, it's very possible that all her symptoms were a bad reaction to her specific combination of medications. Your white cell count is a little low but your blood looks good. So we're going to keep you for another 24 hours for observation and run a few more tests and you should be released tomorrow. I'm going to send a nurse in to change out your IV, if you're not going to eat anything we need to get nutrients into you somehow. You boys are welcome to stay as long as you like just remember she needs to rest," the doctor tells us.

"We'll be sure she rests," Owen assures the doctor.

"Good I'll be back in a while and a nurse will be in shortly," the doctor says and leaves the room.

"It's gotta be my chemo meds, the doctor talked to us for over an hour about how they have to find the right combination and all the side effects the treatments can have," Clare comments when the doctor is gone.

"Yeah I hope so," I nod but I still have the sinking feeling in my stomach.

Owen is telling Clare how he first met Sean when Owen was all but twelve and hanging out at the ravine. Clare is smiling and she looks happy and other than being a little pale and obviously tired she seems healthy. After a while the nurse comes back in to check her vitals and take her for a CT. While she's gone my phone rings and it's Eli, he tried calling me yesterday but I wouldn't take his calls, I didn't know what to say to him after finding out he cheated on Clare.

"What?" Is how I answer the phone.

"Adam I made a mistake I didn't mean to please talk to Clare," Eli begs me.

"You know you're my friend but honestly I think Clare's better without you and the last thing she needs right now is dealing with you. You cheated on Clare and now you have to live with the consequences. Don't contact her she doesn't need stress from you she's sick and no one knows why. I don't feel like lecturing you right now but if you call back I'm sure Owen will be happy to do so," I inform Eli before hanging up.

"If he calls back to talk to Clare or about Clare I'll talk to him," Owen says and his stomach growls.

"You three should go eat breakfast, I'll wait here for Clare I've already eaten," I tell them.

"Yeah I'm starved, we'll be back in a bit, tell my Veep we just went to get breakfast," my brother comments and I nod.

They leave and I sit on the bed waiting for Clare to return and hoping that they figure out what's wrong with her.

**(CLARE)**

"Mom you don't have to stay tonight I'll be okay in the hospital overnight. I'm feeling a lot better and they said I can go home in the morning. You were here all last night you should go home and sleep," I insist to my mother.

It's after nine at night and my mom's been here for a few hours. Adam, Owen, Dallas and Drew stayed most of the day, one or two would leave for a short time to get food, walk around or use the washroom but other than that they'd been in my room keeping me entertained. Mom and Glen had come with dinner for me and I ate a little, after I ate Mom told the guys to go home and they could see me tomorrow if I was up for it. Mom and Glen had stayed and Mom was going to stay in the hospital with me.

"Clare's right Honey, if something happens they'll call us and Clare needs to rest," Glen urges her.

"Okay but I'll be back first thing in the morning; I found all kinds of websites about holistic alternatives to chemo and immune boosting supplements. We'll get you better, I'll do everything to make sure you're healthy again," Mom says kissing my forehead.

"Get some rest Clare," Glen tells me waving as they leave.

My parents leave and I let out a breath, my mom's been fussing over me since I was in the hospital with cancer, not that I don't understand, she was afraid but it's suffocating the way she hovers and fusses.

I turn on the TV and wait for the doctor to come in and give me something to sleep but the next person in my room is not the doctor.

"You came back," I smile when I see Sean.

"Told you I would, I'd have come back sooner but I had some errands to run after catching up on some sleep. I did bring these though," Sean tells me producing a bouquet of flowers from behind his back.

"That's sweet and they're lovely but you didn't have to do that," I reply.

"Actually I thought your room could use some flowers," he says setting them on my bedside.

While waiting for them to come and drug me to sleep Sean and I catch up a little. He tells me about being discharged from the army and getting trained as an EMT. I start to tell him about life since Darcy left when the doctor comes in.

"Flirting with my patient Sean?" Dr. Lee teases.

"Clare and I are old acquaintances, we'll finish catching up another time I believe they're about to make sure you get some sleep," Sean says giving me a grin before leaving my room.

"Alright Clare I'm going to give you a sedative to help you sleep. We'll run a few more tests in the morning but I think it's safe for you to go home with your new medications in the morning. You can even go to school if you're up for it but take it easy," Dr. Lee tells me as he puts something into my IV.

I nod and yawn, taking off my wig, Dr. Lee leaves and I soon drift to sleep. A deep peaceful dreamless drug induced sleep. I wake up at six when the nurse comes to take my vitals. Before they let me have breakfast they take my blood again and urine. I hope that's the last of the tests. At seven Mom comes in and Dr. Lee tells her I can go home, he tells her everything he told me last night and gives her a bag with my prescriptions.

"Are you hungry? I'll stop at The Dot for you to get breakfast before I take you home. You should rest today, spend the day in bed and I'll make your favorite soup or you can eat something someone brought. Everyone from church brought something over yesterday, flowers or food and lots of get well cards. The whole church is praying for you to get better," Mom comments when we're in the car to go home.

"Breakfast from The Dot would be good I am a little hungry but I don't need to rest Mom I want to go to school. The doctor said I was okay and it was probably just my meds, if I start to feel sick again I'll come home," I state firmly.

"I suppose keeping your studies up is important, okay I'll swing by The Dot so you can get breakfast and take you home to change but make sure to take your meds."

"I will."

"And if you feel any worse you come home right away," Mom insists.

"Promise," I nod. Mom stops at The Dot and gives me some money; I go in and order breakfast.

"Feeling better?" Owen asks.

"Much, a little weak still but much better," I smile as the waitress hands me my food. "I have to get home and change for school I guess I'll see you there if you're working."

"Yep headed there now, I'll be there until lunch," Owen replies.

I smile leaving the café and start eating while Mom drives me home. I finish eating at the kitchen table and then go upstairs to get ready for school. Mom insists on driving me to school and tells me again and again to call her if I feel sick at all. I go into the student council office where I find Drew and Adam and I tell them I'm feeling better and everything the doctor said. Drew tells me he moved student council to this afternoon in case I was feeling better. Drew walks Adam and I to class, the morning goes by rather quickly and other than feeling a little weak I feel good. I feel great compared to how I have been feeling lately. At lunch we meet Drew, Dallas, Jenna and Connor in the garden to have lunch and Owen joins us. I'm about to sit down when I see Mom pull up and I tell the others I'll be right back.

"Mom what are you doing here?" I question.

"I brought you lunch, organic vegetable soup and I got a lot of supplements to help with your immune system. Did you take your chemo meds this morning? How are you feeling?" Mom inquires.

"I took my meds and I feel fine," I tell her.

"Good here take these now and take these this afternoon," Mom says handing me too boxes filled with pill capsules.

"What are they?" I ask her looking at the pills.

"Herbs, medicines and supplements it's better than the poison the chemo puts in your body. Call me if you need anything Honey, I love you."

"I love you too Mom," I smile taking the soup and the pill boxes. I start to walk back to my friends and Mom drives off.

"What's all that?" Jenna queries.

"Lunch and more pills, supplements and stuff, I need water and a spoon guess I'll go to the caf," I remark.

"I'll get it Clare, I need a drink anyway," Dallas says getting up.

Dallas returns with a coke for himself, water and spoon for me. I take the supplements and then eat the soup, it's actually quite good and I eat the whole thing. Owen leaves for his class at U of T right after lunch, I'm feeling stronger now that I have some food in me and make it through afternoon classes with no problem. I even do fine in student council, when we break for a few minutes I take the other box of pills Mom gave me, they're all the same supplements as earlier. Near the end of meeting I get a headache, it comes on suddenly I lean forward on the table rubbing my temples and Drew puts his hand on my back.

"Are you okay?" Drew questions.

"My head hurts," I state the obvious.

"I figured that do you want to go home?" Drew asks.

I shake my head but then my hand begins twitching, my fingers and toes feel numb and I get dizzy. I'm being overwhelmed by symptoms with no apparent cause.

"Call my mom I think I should go home," I whisper quietly to Drew.

"Clare? You don't look so good," Adam speaks up interrupting Dallas.

"She's going home, Adam grab her purse and call her mom. One of us should probably wait outside with her," Drew says.

"No I'm okay, carry on with the meeting," I tell them grabbing my purse since Adam has my mom's number. "Adam can you come over and catch me up later?" I request standing up.

"Yeah of course," Adam nods.

"I'm fine everyone it's just a headache," I tell them but my muscles feel weak and they don't want to work. I try to take a step and I falter, grabbing onto the back of the chair while Drew leaps up to steady me.

"Okay meeting over, Adam call her mom I'll get her outside," Drew says picking up my backpack and then me. I'd argue that I can walk but I'm not actually sure that I can right now.

Drew carries me out to the steps while everyone follows and Adam is on the phone with my mom. They sit on the steps with me and wait for my mom, she pulls up and I see her face burdened with worry. Drew decides to carry me to the car and Adam carries my backpack. I say goodbye and promise to call Adam later before Mom drives off.

"You get straight in bed when we get home and you'll stay home from school to rest tomorrow," Mom says as she starts driving home and I just nod.

**(OWEN)**

"Good work today Owen I'll see you tomorrow," Coach Armstrong says when I'm ready to leave for the day.

"Thank you Sir," I smile and walk around to the front of school where I find everyone from student council aside from Clare. "What's up? What's going on?" I question.

"Clare got sick again her mom just picked her up," Adam tells me.

"I thought she was better," I comment.

"So did we, we should get home ourselves you want to come over Owen?" Drew offers.

"Yeah sure," I nod.

They get in their car and I get in mine following them to their house. Audra already has dinner ready and we eat with Audra and Omar before going down to the basement.

"I don't get it she was fine all day and then she got sick, really sick and it was sudden," Adam says when we're on sofa.

"What happened, what were you guys doing?" I ask them.

"We were just in student council, we were maybe half an hour from finishing and she got a headache. She said she was okay but then her hand was twitching and when she stood up she couldn't walk, more than just being weak like her legs wouldn't work," Drew tells me.

"I'll go check on her on my way home, I should get home anyway I have homework," I remark.

"I want to check on her too," Adam says.

"We'll all go, I'll tell Mom we're checking on Clare and we'll be right back," Drew comments and runs upstairs.

We split up into two cars and drive to Clare's house. Adam rings the bell and Glen answers a moment later.

"Hi kids," he says stepping aside to let us in.

"Can we see Clare?" Adam asks and Helen looks over at us from the kitchen.

"How sweet of you all to stop by," Helen smiles. There's a ton of food in the kitchen, casseroles, fruit, salad, vegetable dishes, all sorts of things and the living room is filled with flowers and cards. It looks like someone died. "Clare's resting in her room, I was just making her a little something to eat, she needs to keep up her strength. You can go up and visit with her but just for a few minutes, she really needs to rest," Helen tells us. We all nod and follow Adam up to Clare's room, he knocks on the door and she calls for us to come in.

"What are you guys doing here?" Clare questions.

"We came to check on you, how do you feel?" I ask her.

"Not good, my hand won't stop twitching and my head is killing me. It makes no sense I was fine all day, all I had was water and those supplements Mom gave me. I had the same pills at lunch and no reaction to them or anything, I don't know what to think anymore," Clare says.

"There's a lot of food and flowers downstairs how come those are the only flowers in your room?" I ask her pointing to the bouquet on her nightstand.

"All the flowers downstairs are from people at church or Mom's work, those are from Sean," Clare explains.

"Ah you do have the hots for him," I grin and then her door opens again and Helen comes in with a tray of food.

"Alright kids Clare need to eat, I'm keeping her home to rest tomorrow but you can visit if you'd like," Helen tells us.

We say goodbye to Clare and we'll see her tomorrow, I wave to the Torres group and get in my car to drive home. I'm worried about Clare, my gut tells me something else is going on and it can't just be her chemo meds.

I finish my homework and shower before going to bed, I have a very odd dream about Clare getting more sick and frail and being in the hospital. After eating breakfast Tris rides with me to school, it's early but I have to get here this early for football practice. Student council is also here, I see them in the office but of course Clare's at home today. After football practice I stay in Armstrong's office to study and leave just before lunch to go to U of T for my classes. As I'm walking down the steps I see a motorcycle pull up, it stops right in front of me and he takes off his helmet.

"Hey Sean," I greet him.

"Hey I came to see Clare," he tells me.

"I'm sure she'd be thrilled but she's not here. She got sick again yesterday afternoon and her mom is making her rest at home," I inform him.

"Sick again? I thought she was getting better?" Sean comments.

"Yeah so did we, she was fine all day and then she got a headache and muscle twitches while in student council. We went by her house; her mom was making her food, or giving her some that people had brought by. Your flowers were by her bed," I tell him and he grins.

"Yeah? I mean I thought she could use some flowers in her hospital room I'm glad she liked them enough to bring them home," Sean tells me trying to play it off.

"Right, you can ask her out you know, I'm pretty sure she likes you too," I remark.

"Well maybe I'll just go over to her house and see how she's doing," Sean says and I smile.

"Just be good to her, her last boyfriend was a real ass. I have to get to class I'll see you later," I tell him and walk to my car.

"_I think I'll call Eli and tell him another guy has a crush on Clare, a guy who's seven years her senior an EMT and army vet. I bet that would drive him nuts!"_

**Update Friday November 14****th**** when we find out what's happening to Clare and she and Sean spend some time together.**


	3. Your Darkest Nightmare

**Happy Friday everyone!**

**Ch.3 Your Darkest Nightmare**

**(CLARE)**

"I'm not sure you should be at school, you can rest for another day, I can take time off work. Or have Mrs. Clarke come to the house to look after you," Mom says as she drives me to school Wednesday morning.

"Mom I already told you I want to go to school, I need to be doing something not lying in bed. I'm student council president, Drew needs me and I feel okay, I'll take it easy and come home if I start to feel ill again," I reply.

"But you haven't even had breakfast," Mom says as a week argument.

"I had some toast, I have money for lunch," I'll be fine.

"Don't forget to take your meds," Mom tells me pulling up to the DeGrassi entrance.

I nod and grab my backpack getting out of the car Drew, Adam and Dallas are on the steps and I join them. We talk for a while, moving inside to our lockers, I open my locker setting in books and getting out my chemo meds.

"Need some water," Owen offers appearing suddenly.

"Thanks," I smile taking his water bottle and swallowing my meds.

"You look better than yesterday," Owen comments.

"I feel better, a little tired maybe and my muscles feel weak but I feel better," I tell him.

"When you're truly feeling better I'll help you with strength training exercises," Owen offers.

"Thanks that would be great," I smile just as the bell rings.

"We should get to class," Drew says.

"Yeah and I have to get to the university, I'll be back after school later," Owen waves walking down the hall.

Given how my days have been today goes surprisingly well, I continue to experience some weakness in my muscles and some tingling but aside from that I feel good all day. I participate in class and by student council I'm feeling better than I have been and I can actually do my duties as student council president. Shortly before the meeting ends I take my afternoon chemo meds. I'm typing on my laptop as Drew wraps up the meeting and then he disappears! I hear him talking but I can't see him sitting at my side, my peripheral vision has gone blurry and dark. I gasp and turn my head to see Drew and everyone else stops and looks at me.

"Clare?" Adam asks putting his hand on my arm.

"My peripheral vision has gone fuzzy I can't see to my sides," I tell them trying not to show how panicked I am.

"The meetings over anyway, come on we'll take you home," Drew says.

"No she should come to our house," Adam speaks up.

"Yeah we'll take you to our house," Drew nods, I stand up and Drew takes my arm.

"I can see Drew just not to the sides," I tell him.

"And I'm being a gentleman, let me feel useful and escort you outside," he argues and I laugh.

Adam grabs my stuff and we go out to the parking lot saying goodbye to Jenna and Connor. We see Owen in the hall and Adam tells him what happened, Owen says to keep him informed and he'll come by later. Drew escorts me all the way to his car and I sit in back with Adam, Drew drives us to his house while I call Mom.

"I'm sleeping at Adam's, I feel okay but Drew and I have a lot of student council stuff to go over so I'm sleeping here. Can you bring me over a bag with a change of clothes and my toothbrush and stuff? Thanks Mom," I say to her voicemail and hang up.

"Don't you need pajamas?" Dallas questions.

"I can borrow a shirt from Adam," I shrug.

"I can call Sean and have him bring over an EMT shirt for you," Adam offers and I giggle.

"My vision is better, I think it's coming back," I tell them blinking my eyes a few times.

"Good now if we could find out what's going on with you that would be even better," Adam remarks.

We arrive at the Torres house, greet Audra and tell her I'm spending the night. She says fine and we go downstairs to start on our homework. Audra calls us up for dinner and the doorbell rings so Adam answers it and my mother steps in.

"Clare darling how are you feeling?" Mom questions coming over to hug me and sort of shoving my overnight bag at Adam.

"I'm fine Mom I told you we just have a lot of student council stuff to go over," I tell her.

"I brought you some food people brought to the house," Mom says grabbing my bag back and taking out two containers. "Well I should get home, you'll be home tomorrow night I don't like you away from the house so long. Thanks for letting her stay Audra call me if she feels ill at all," Mom asserts and then leaves.

"Sure no problem Helen, anytime Clare's like one of the family," Audra says when the door is slimed.

"Sorry," I apologize for my mother putting the containers on the counter because I want to eat the dinner that Audra made.

"It's alright, I know how your mother can be and you are like one of the family we're always happy to have you. How are you feeling Clare?" Audra questions setting dinner on the table.

"I was feeling pretty good all day, a little weak and some tingling sensations in my hands. Some problems with my vision but other than that, uh shouldn't we wait for Omar?" I ask as everyone starts eating.

"Dad is working on a big case he'll probably get home about midnight," Adam informs me.

We talk mostly about student council and the Halloween dance at the end of the month. After dinner the four of us return downstairs to finish our homework. Just as we're sitting down the basement door opens and Owen comes in with Sean.

"What are you guys doing here?" I inquire smiling at Sean.

"I told you I'd come by later and I called Sean and found out it was his day off and he said he wanted to come over. How's your vision?" Owen asks sitting down next to Dallas and Sean sits next to him.

"What's wrong with your vision?" Sean questions.

"It's fine now but I was having trouble with my peripheral vision," I explain and Sean nods.

"I have Saturday off, if you're feeling better I'd like to take you out," Sean says to me and the whole room goes quiet looking at me for my answer.

"That would be nice," I grin feeling myself blush.

"Great," Sean smiles.

"Hang on," Owen says standing up and then he come over picking me up suddenly.

"What are you doing?" I question Owen with a gasp as I put my arms around his neck.

"Just this," he replies setting me in Sean's lap and Sean puts his arms around me. "Okay Sean kiss the girl and Adam get a picture and send it to Eli," Owen commands.

I smile and shake my head, then lock my eyes with Sean and he softly places his lips on mine. I hear Adam taking a picture while Owen, Drew and Dallas cheer us on.

"I'm sure Eli will love it," Adam snickers as I pull out of the kiss and slide into Owen's now empty seat next to Sean.

**(ADAM)**

A few seconds after sending the picture text to Eli he calls me and I step outside to answer it.

"It's Clare's new boyfriend, or at least they're going on a date this weekend. He's an EMT and she's happy, you cheated on her Eli, you cheated on her and she still needed you. You're still my friend Eli but you may have lost Clare for good this time."

"It was a mistake Adam, one I regret but she won't even talk to me," Eli responds.

"She needs time Eli, she's been sick and she likes Sean. Give her some time and maybe she can forgive you and maybe just maybe you two can be friends again. I have to go I have homework," I tell him and hang up.

Walking inside again Clare looks at me biting her lip, she knows it was Eli but neither of us say anything. Sean and Owen leave after a short while and we finally finish our homework. Clare sleeps in Drew's room and he takes the sofa in the basement, I give her a t-shirt to sleep in and go to bed. My sleep is disturbed by odd dreams about Clare, dreams that make no sense but I wake up panting and with this urgent feeling for my best friend's life. Leaping out of bed I run from my room to my brother's room where she's sleeping, the sound of the door bursting open wakes her up and she rubs her eyes looking at me.

"Adam?" She yawns, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I uh…just came to wake you up for school," I tell her.

"By running into the room?" She asks.

"Yeah it's the only way I can wake up Drew," I lie and close the door so she can get dressed.

I get ready for school and when I come downstairs Drew and Dallas are eating breakfast. Clare is the last one downstairs and she sits down taking some cantaloupe for breakfast. She brings one of the containers her mom brought her last night to have for lunch; we grab our backpacks and get into the car. Drew drives us to school; we park next to Becky and Luke and walk in together going to our lockers. Clare takes her morning meds and I watch her closely, yesterday she had trouble with her vision just after taking her afternoon ones. She seems to do fine, she's not dizzy or anything anyway, she gets out her books and then Owen appears.

"Still feeling good?" Owen asks her.

"Quite good thank you," she smiles.

"Well if you start to feel ill I'm sure we can call Sean to come give you mouth to mouth," Drew teases and Clare grimaces at him.

"Who's Sean?" Luke questions.

"I'll fill you in on the way to class," Dallas tells him.

"Yeah I have no classes today so I'm hanging around, going to work on new plays for the team," Owen says.

We hang out in the foyer for a while, filling Luke and Becky in about Sean. When the bell rings Clare and I walk to class. I guess my dream has me paranoid because I watch her intently all morning but nothing happens. At lunch we meet everyone else and eat in the garden. Clare has a salad with every superfood veggie I've ever heard of with some goat cheese on it. Owen joins us for lunch since he's hanging out at DeGrassi all day. We mostly talk about what we're going to be for Halloween.

"Are you going to ask Sean to the dance?" Becky questions.

"He doesn't go to DeGrassi," Clare shakes her head.

"Neither do I and I'm still going," Owen says.

"Yes but you work here," she points out.

"And you're student council VP I'm sure Sean can come as your date, anyway he knows Simpson he dated Emma off and on for like ever," Owen comments.

"I'll ask him, but he'll have to be approved by Mr. Simpson I'm sure," Clare responds.

"Just have him come in his EMT uniform and pretend to be a medic for the dance," Dallas comments and Clare laughs and then starts rubbing her head.

"Clare you okay?" I question with a worried tone.

"Yeah just a headache it came on smlgn," her words become gibberish and she looks up at me with fear in her eyes. She stands up takes two steps and it's like her legs stop working! She beings to fall and we all leap up to catch her, my brother gets to her first and he picks her up.

"Her muscles look at her arms and legs, the muscles are all in spasm," Owen says with deep worry in his tone.

"Call an ambulance we need to get her to a hospital," I command with an agonized tone. Clare's aphasia is getting worse, she's trying to talk to us but nothing makes sense and she's getting frustrated. "Don't talk, it's okay Luke's calling an ambulance, you'll be okay," I tell her but I worry that she might not be.

She clings to Drew hiding her head in his chest, because of fear or shame I'm not sure. He holds her, sitting on the bench with her and soon we hear sirens. Owen takes her from Drew and we rush to the ambulance, not surprised to see Sean as one of the EMTs that gets out.

"What happened?" Sean questions as he takes her from Owen and puts her in the ambulance.

"You guys follow," I say to my brother getting in the back of ambulance because there is no way in hell I'm leaving Clare right now. "We were eating lunch, everything seemed okay and then she complained of a headache. She then got aphasia, she tried to get up and walk but it's like her legs wouldn't support her. She started to collapse, Drew picked her up and Owen pointed out that her muscles were twitching. What's wrong with her?"

"I don't know but we're going to find out," Sean tells me getting a blood pressure cuff on her and taking her vitals while his partner rushes us to the hospital. "She's tachycardic and prehypertensive. Clare I'm going to ask you some yes or no questions, just nod and shake your head okay?" Sean questions and Clare nods. "Do you have tingling or numbness anywhere?"

She nods again and squeezes her hands.

"Are you having vision problems?" Sean asks and she shakes her head. "Okay I know you're scared but I'm here with you so is Adam, we need to slow down your breathing," Sean tells her taking her hand and I take the other, she squeezes our hands tight. "Close your eyes and take a deep breath, slow down your breathing or you're going to add heart trouble to what's already wrong with you," Sean instructs.

She takes a few deep breaths and her breathing slows down just as we pull up to the hospital. Sean and his partner rush her in with me running behind. They quickly explain to the doctor what happened and Clare is taken back.

"Pam this Clare's best friend Adam he can give a history, her other friends will be arriving soon. I have to go back on shift but I'll be here as soon as I'm off and if anything changes let me know," Sean requests of the female nurse with lots of light brown curls.

She nods and Sean leaves while the nurse looks at me. I start to tell her all the symptoms Clare has had recently and that she was doing really well for a couple weeks after chemo. I'm still talking when Helen rushes in followed seconds later by Drew, Dallas and Owen.

"Luke and Becky stayed at school they'll come later and they told Simpson what's going on. How is she?" Drew asks.

"I have no idea, she's back with the doctors, she's terrified I know that," I inform them and look at Helen who is telling the nurse all about Clare's cancer and how hard that was.

Glen arrives a short time later while we sit in the waiting room and Helen's telling anyone who will listen the hardships she's been through with Clare being ill. Glen pulls her away and gets her to sit down just as a doctor comes out.

"We have Clare sedated, her muscle spasms have stopped but her stomach is distended. We brought in an ultrasound and she has some internal bleeding in the abdomen, it looks like one of her abdominal muscles tore and all her muscles are showing degeneration and weakness," the doctor tells us and I suddenly can't breathe because of the lump in my throat.

"Is her cancer back?" Helen inquires.

"It's unlikely but we can't rule out anything, including an infection or possibly a virus like guillaine barre syndrome. We'll run some tests but the first priority is to drain the blood from her stomach and repair the tear. She'll be prepped for surgery and taken in, it shouldn't take long, we'll need you to sign consent forms," he says to Helen.

"Yes of course," she nods then she and Glen get up and follow the doctor.

"B should be getting out of class I'm going to call her," Drew says getting out his phone and walking outside.

All I can think is that Clare's been through cancer and now some mystery illness is going to kill her! I feel helpless; I hate waiting, sitting and doing nothing but hoping and praying. Helen and Glen walk back in and Helen is on her cell phone, if it were my mom she'd be calling Dad, my grandparents, all our family and Clare and Eli if they weren't already here. Helen is on the phone with her church pastor, which may not be so bad in itself but it's what she's saying that gets me.

"I know it's tragic and they just can't figure out what's wrong…yes thank you Father prayers would be appreciated…no I'll probably sleep here but I worry about Glen being all alone…yes well I've hardly had time to do anything and the house is a mess…oh thank you Father but I don't want them to go out of their way…oh well thank you I just feel like such a burden but I'm very worried about Clare."

She says a bit more and then hangs up, I know she just sounds like a concerned mom but she's too concerned and she's fishing for pity. The way she talks about her house being a mess and not being a burden the tone she uses it's just so phony. Helen acts worried, and I'm sure she is but I also think that she's enjoying this, Clare might be the sick one but Helen seems to be the center of attention, at least as far as the church is concerned.

After an hour of being in the waiting room Mom shows up, Principal Simpson apparently called her and she didn't get the message until after coming out of her meeting. She talks with Helen and Glen, telling them if they need anything to let her know. Becky, Luke, Jenna and Connor come shortly after that and then the doctor comes back in.

"She's out of surgery, everything went well, she'll be coming out of sedation soon. You can go back and see her if you like, we'll be keeping her for 24 hours for observation and I'm going to meet with her oncologist tomorrow," the doctor says.

"Does that mean her cancer is back?" I question with that lump in my throat again.

"No we haven't determined anything yet but I need to consult with her oncologist about course of treatment. We'll take some blood tomorrow and do an LP to look for infection. If you'll follow me I'll take you to Clare's room."

We follow him up to recovery, Clare looks like she's sleeping peacefully, other than the IV in her arm and the monitors beeping it's like she's fine. Helen sits in a chair and Glen stands by her while I sit on Clare's bed and take her hand. As soon as I do Clare opens her eyes and I smile at her.

"Adam? What's going on?" She asks.

"Hey you can talk again that's gotta be a good sign," Owen says and Clare looks around me to see him.

"Did I pass out in class or something?" Clare questions.

"You don't remember what happened?" I ask her.

"I remember being in physics," she replies.

"So you don't remember eating lunch and then getting sick? You don't remember being in the ambulance?" I query and she shakes her head.

"I'll go find the doctor and tell him she has some short term memory loss," Mom says leaving the room.

"Everyone at church is praying for you Clare," Helen tells her and Clare just nods.

Mom returns with the doctor and he looks at Clare, asking her some cognitive questions. Then he asks to speak to Helen and Glen in the hall and I know that can't be good.

"Adam stay with me please," Clare practically begs, she's really scared and so am I.

"Are you kidding I'm not leaving even for a second," I assure her and she nods trying to wipe the tears from her face.

"I'm sure you'll be fine Clare," Jenna tries to assure her and Clare nods again.

"Sean will be back after his shift and I'm sure he'll stay too if you ask him to," I tell her.

"I don't want my mom to stay, she's going to try to make sure she goes home," Clare pleads looking at my mom.

"I'll take care of it Honey you just worry about getting better," Mom smiles reassuringly at her.

"I called Bianca she's going to come home as soon as her last class is over tomorrow," Drew tells Clare and she nods.

"What did the doctor say?" Owen asks when Glen comes back in.

"They're concerned about the neurological symptoms, the doctor is calling in a neurological consult and they'll want to do a CT when she's stronger. They're also going to be taking blood and running a battery of tests you'll be in the hospital for a day or two is there anything you need?" Glen asks Clare.

"No just a change of clothes for when they release me, where's Mom?"

"She's very upset and called Father Christopher again," Glen replies.

"Glen can I talk to you a moment?" Mom requests taking him out of the room and we look back at Clare.

"We should let you rest, we'll stop by tomorrow, don't worry about student council we've got it covered," Jenna tells Clare.

She hugs Clare and then leaves with Connor, Luke and Becky leave also but the rest of us aren't going anywhere. Glen returns a short time later saying he's going to take Helen home to eat, Mom says she'll bring me a bag and something to eat. Now it's just the four of us and Clare, she looks scared and tired I wish there was something I could do to make her feel better. Owen starts talking to fill the silence, just telling random stories but it's distracting and seems to cheer Clare up. Mom comes back with a bag for me and pizza for the four of us. Mom tells Drew, Owen and Dallas that Clare needs her rest and they should leave when they're done eating and they tell her they will. Mom kisses Clare's forehead, says to call if she needs anything and then leaves. Helen and Glen come in a short while later, Helen carries a thermos.

"Glen thinks it's better if I don't stay tonight but I brought you some organic chicken soup that Mrs. Henley made, I checked with the doctor and you should try and eat something. I'll be back in the morning to check on you," Helen tells her. Clare takes the thermos and sets it on her table; her parents stay for a few more minutes and then leave. Just after they're gone Sean comes in and Clare brightens up when she sees him.

"Hey Gorgeous how do you feel?" He asks kissing her cheek and giving her flowers.

"Apparently better than the last time I saw you but I don't remember it," Clare replies.

"Yeah I heard about the short term memory loss, they're bringing in a neurologist though and they'll figure out what's wrong," he assures her.

"We should go, we'll be back in the morning and Adam will call us if anything changes," Owen speaks up.

He stands with Drew and Dallas, they all hug Clare goodbye, wave to Sean and I then leave. I get off Clare's bed to let Sean sit down and the doctor comes in with another doctor. It's the neurologist and he does an exam on Clare then the two doctors leave.

"You want to eat something?" Sean asks taking note of the thermos on Clare's table.

"I'm not really hungry but I guess I'll eat a little," she says.

"You should have your medications too," I point out grabbing her purse so she can get out the right meds.

She takes them with some water and Sean pours out some soup into the thermos lid. He leaves and returns with a spoon and napkin, Clare sips at the soup while Sean and I make small talk to fill the silence. Sean and I are talking about the Raptors when Clare makes a noise and we look at her. She's stopped eating because her hand is twitching; I notice other muscles twitching too. Her heart rate and blood pressure are rising and she looks like she's in pain.

"I don't feel good, my head…it's hard to breathe…my muscles…" she's not quite making sentences but at least she doesn't have aphasia. Sean moves the tray away to get a better look at her and Clare looks right at me, her eyes are filled with fear and the words that come from her will haunt me until the day I die. "Adam help me," she pleads in a terrified tone and then her eyes roll back into her head and she begins convulsing.

"CLARE!" I scream in an agonized tone as I believe I'm watching my friend die in front of my eyes.

"Doc," Sean calls leaping up and holding Clare down, "she's seizing!"

The next few minutes seem to go in slow motion and yet be a blur; Clare's room becomes filled with doctors and nurses. They push me out of the room and start yelling a bunch of stuff. They're trying desperately to help her, as soon as they stop the seizure she's unconscious and the doctors all speak quickly and urgently. They seem to be arguing while Sean kisses Clare's lips and stroke her hair. The doctors start yelling again then they move Sean away and bring in a gurney putting Clare on it and rushing away.

"Where are they taking her?" I ask Sean.

"For a CT and MRI they're worried about tumors on her spine or her brain," Sean informs me.

"Is she going to be okay?" I question him.

"I don't know they don't even know what's wrong. I hope so," Sean says with a worried and almost defeated tone.

"Hey doc," I call running up to one of the doctors that was in Clare's room. "I know this is probably going to sound crazy but test her for poison, and test these too," I tell him running back to Clare's room. I pour the remaining soup and back in the thermos and put the lid back on, then grab all her chemo meds taking them out to the doctor. "She took her meds right before she felt sick, it's happened before and also with eating anything her mom brought her," I tell him.

"Good to know, thank you son I'll get these down to the lab and have them tested," he says. I nod and get out my cell calling my brother.

"What happened?" He asks already with a worried tone.

"She had a seizure, they're worried about tumors, she was having trouble breathing and her muscles were in spasm," I kind of babble all together.

"I'll tell Mom and call Owen we're on our way," Drew says hanging up.

Sean puts his hand on my shoulder, we look down the hospital hallway and we wait for Clare to come back.

**(CLARE)**

My eyes open slowly, blinking and squinting at the bright light. I see a lot of blurry faces looking at me and feel my hand being squeezed.

"Thank heavens how do you feel?" Adam questions.

My eyes adjust and I see not only him but Sean, Owen, Dallas, Audra, Omar, Drew and even Bianca.

"How long was I out? Did I pass out?" I query still very confused and not able to recall anything.

"You've been asleep for six hours, I drove down as soon as Drew called and told me you had a seizure," Bianca explains.

"I don't remember that," I comment looking at Adam and Sean.

"I'm not surprised what's the last thing you do remember?" Sean asks.

"Drew and the other's leaving and being alone with you and Adam," I tell him. He opens his mouth but the doctor comes in and we all look at the doctor.

"Well it's good to see you awake, thanks to your friend Adam we know what's going on now and we can treat it," he tells me and I smile at Adam while a nurse rushes in to change one of the bags on my IV. "You're suffering from acute mercury poisoning; you've been getting increasing doses of inorganic mercury, probably mercury chloride for the last week or so. We believe at first you were receiving diluted doses but we found lethal levels in the soup you were eating last night and in your chemo meds, we found it laced on the capsules. Normally mercury poisoning would not cause internal bleeding or seizures but because of the high doses, the amount and build up in your system and all your body went through with cancer it wreaked havoc on your system until the dose last night nearly shut your body down. Because of Adam's quick thinking we went ahead and gave you activated charcoal and that helped. We are not sure of the long term effects yet and we'll be treating you with IV medications. You'll be in the hospital a few days and once the mercury is entirely out of your system we can find out what, if any, permanent damage there is. I know this is a lot, we've called your mother and stepfather down and they will be intercepted by the SCAN team as soon as they arrive and spoken to separately. Is there someone you can stay with when you're released?" The doctor asks but I'm still reeling from the fact that my own mother was poisoning me!

"She can stay with us," Audra speaks up.

"Good I'll have some papers for you to sign and I'll come back and check on you after the SCAN team has spoken to your parents," the doctor tells me and leaves the room.

"My mom was intentionally keeping me sick! She was poisoning me with mercury! I'm barely in remission from cancer and she starts trying to kill me?!" I speak aloud, shocked and appalled and incredibly angry. I squeeze Sean's hand and burst into tears, sorrowful, angry and frightened tears. A sickening feeling churns in my stomach; the woman that gave me life was poisoning me!

**Update Thursday December 11****th**** with Clare dealing with what her mom did. Her friends helping her heal and Clare getting closer to Sean, it's also likely to be the last chapter and if that's the case this will be replaced with Devious Deceits.**

**FYI SCAN stands for Suspected Child Abuse and Neglect.**


	4. I Pray You Go Away for Good

**Happy Birthday Blue. ! In honor of your birthday I dedicate this chapter to you and we have cupcakes!**

**Last chapter enjoy everyone.**

**Ch. 4 I Pray You Go Away for Good**

**(CLARE)**

"How could she? I'm barely in remission from cancer and she decides it's a good idea to poison me," I say in a thin voice that's hoarse from crying. The news that I was sick because my own mom was making that way was shocking to say the least. It hadn't even really fully sunk in I was just overwhelmed that a woman who I thought loved me unconditionally was making me ill.

"You'll come stay with us, you can take over my room or something," Adam tells me.

"Or my house, I can live in the dorms or the garage," Owen offers.

"You could move in with me," Sean suggests.

"That's sweet but we haven't even been on our first date, I don't think we should jump to living together," I tell him but I'm smiling at the offer.

"She'll stay with us, I already texted Mom and Dad's arranging for emergency removal. You could live on your own since you're old enough but we don't know what effects all this will have ion your health," Adam points out.

"I've scheduled some tests for Monday so we can find out, you might have mercury in your system for years but we're getting most of it with the IV's and activate charcoal. We'll know what the long term effects may be and you'll be in the hospital all Monday for tests. Depending on how you feel we'll probably release you Tuesday morning," the doctor tells me. He hands Adam some papers to give to Audra and Omar then he leaves the room and I look at Sean.

"So much for our date," I sigh.

"We'll just have to improvise," he grins.

"Should we call Jake?" Drew asks.

"I guess so, his dad might be investigated too though," I comment.

"I'll call," Owen says leaving the room and it gets quiet. All I can do is think about what Mom was doing, how she was poisoning me and wondering when it started, was she putting it in everything and most of all why?

I must get lost in my thoughts because the next thing I hear is Audra and Omar talking with Adam. I look up, blinking my eyes and realize I had my head on Sean's chest, an action I don't remember doing.

"We'll have the house all ready for you to move in when you're released. You can take Adam's room and we'll figure out the rest," Audra assures me.

"The papers to remove you will be ready by this evening, we can go to the house and get your things," Omar offers.

"You might have to check it all for mercury," I say bitterly.

"Actually the police are doing that now," Audra informs me.

I get an image of cops swarming my house, searching every room, food and medicine for mercury. It's a frightening and heartbreaking image and I squeeze Sean's hand. Owen returns and Audra is discussing with her family how to rearrange the house to fit me.

"Clare I'm Dr. Sherman, I'm a psychiatrist here at the hospital and I've spoken with your mother," says a middle aged man with greying brown hair and brown eyes. "You may want to ask your friends to leave," he tells me and I shake my head.

"No I want them here, they can hear this," I reply.

"Have you heard of Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy?" She asks and I nod. "It's a psychological condition and your mother has it. She was keeping you sick because she liked the attention it got her. She's being admitted for psychological evaluation and care. I understand you have somewhere to stay so we don't need to involve the foster care system. You probably will not be placed back in your mother's household, she doesn't admit to there being a problem, she's a skilled liar and has compartmentalized the poisonings. I've already spoken with your doctor and the SCAN team. From this point your mother will continue psychotherapy and will be prosecuted for child abuse. Do you have any questions?"

"She did it all just to get attention," I comment, it's not really a question just an unbelieving statement.

"It goes deeper than that but yes to put it simply," she replies.

She steps out of the room and I put my head back on Sean's chest. He puts his arm around me while the Torres parents step outside to talk to the psychiatrist.

"If all she wanted was attention couldn't she have found a way to do it that didn't involve killing me," I grumble with anger in my tone.

"She's sick Clare, she didn't know she was doing it," Sean tells me.

"I don't care I never want to see her again, she was making sick, she could have killed me and all because she liked the attention and the pity. All the food people brought by, all the time mom spent bringing me food and fawning over me, it's not because she cared it's so she could tell everyone and get pity. She's been talking about me to everyone at church and I thought it was because she was worried but she wasn't worried she was doing it for the attention! I've been feeling terrible, I passed out, missed classes, I have gaps in my memory, my peripheral vision disappeared and the aphasia and all because my sick mother wanted attention."

I'm outraged, I feel betrayed, I was betrayed by my very own mother who even if she wasn't trying to kill me was trying to keep me ill. Everything she did that seemed so nurturing was to keep me sick and have everyone feel sorry for her. My father moved and I barely see him, sister went to Africa and my mother was keeping me sick, some family.

"Then you won't ever see her again, I'll be sure of it," Sean says brushing the hair from my face and I smile at him.

"What did Jake say?" I ask Owen.

"He was mostly just shocked, he was going to call his dad but I think Glen's being questioned by the cops. I gave him your room number so he can call you," Owen tells me.

Audra and Omar come back in and tell us they're going to my house to get my stuff. I send Adam with them as well as Bianca and tell them everything I absolutely want although I'm sure I'm forgetting some things. Drew, Dallas and Owen leave to get lunch and update Jenna and the others. Now I'm alone with Sean, which I'd be a lot happier about if I wasn't in a hospital bed.

"Do you need anything? I switched my shift so I could be here but it means I work tonight," Sean tells me.

"No I'm okay, I feel tired though," I reply as I become hit with a wave of exhaustion.

Throughout the day Sean has moved onto my bed more and more so that now he's lying on it with me. He's on his side and his arm has been around me for a while.

"You should sleep then," he replies moving so that he can hold me better and I can sleep on his chest.

At first all I can think is what terrible things my mother did and then I think about Sean and fall asleep.

**(SEAN)**

Usually when I come to the hospital it's in uniform and bringing someone in. The last couple of days though I've come in street clothes to see someone. Not just a patient, I have checked on people we've brought in before to see if they made it or how they're doing. But Clare is different, I came to check on her because I care about her, I was serious when I told her she should move in. Of course she was right it probably wouldn't have been a good idea but I still meant it. Tonight is Saturday night; I came not only to see Clare but to have her date. I can't take her out since she has to stay in the hospital but I wasn't about to let that ruin our date.

"You look very dressed up, I'm going to be in a hospital gown and I can't leave my room," Clare comments when she sees me come into her room.

"Actually we picked up a dress for you last night when we went to your house, shoes and everything," Adam informs her.

"And you can leave your room just not the hospital," I point out.

"Come on Clare I'll help you get dressed," Bianca says to her and then looks at me, "can we take her off the monitors and IV?"

"Yeah it's been cleared by her doctor, she'll be fine," I nod stopping Clare's IV and disconnecting her from the monitors.

She follows Bianca into the washroom and I'm sure they'll be in there for some time. Adam tells me that they'll be making a room in the attic, he or Drew will take that and Clare will take the room of whoever moves up there. Drew says he'll probably take it and that puts Clare right next to Adam. He mom has also been formally charged with child abuse, she's still in the hospital in the psych ward but she's been charged and a trial date will be set soon. Clare comes from the washroom in a dark green dress and matching shoes, her hair is brushed and her long bangs curled just a little.

"You look gorgeous," I grin.

"I'll call in a bit to check on you," Adam tells her.

She smiles and I take her hand, we walk through the hospital wings and take the elevator up to the roof.

"How did you manage this?" She asks when seeing the picnic blanket with cushions I put up here.

"When you know everyone in the hospital it's easy to pull a few strings," I reply walking her over and we sit down. "Plus I asked Adam what you're favorite restaurant and favorite dish was and I got take out," I inform her opening the thermal cooler I brought up before going to Clare's room.

"Clever," she smiles kissing my cheek.

"Adam told me that they're making the attic into a room," I comment as we begin eating.

"Yeah and I'll have my own room so that I never has to see my mom again. Jake called today he didn't say much, I don't think he knew what to say, just told me to feel better. They questioned Glen but he had no idea, the detective said he was horrified when he learned but I could have told them he wasn't doing it too. He sent flowers but hasn't been by, Audra said he was probably afraid but she and Omar went to talk to him today, some legal stuff," she says.

"He probably feels guilty too; probably like he should have noticed or stopped Helen or that he could have prevented it. I'm sure he'll come to see you," I tell her.

"Yeah I guess, everyone else came by today. Jenna, Connor, Luke, Becky, even Mr. Simpson. I asked him if you could come with me to the Halloween dance in a couple of weeks and he said it was okay, if you want to go with me?"

"I would love to take you, should we dress up?"

"It is a costume dance," she tells me.

"Then I guess we'll have to think of costumes, should we go in a couples costume or surprise each other?"

"I've never got in a couples costume we could do that I suppose. Something tasteful though I don't want go as Homer and Marge Simpson or anything like that," she replies.

"Something tasteful no problem, we can start looking on line and hit the costume shops when you're out of the hospital," I comment. When she's done eating I push the trash to one side and hold her while we look at the stars.

"You know I hate that my mother did this, I hate that she made me sick and I don't know what the effects will be over time. I hate that I had to go through this because my mom went nuts but the one good thing to come from all this is that I have you. If this hadn't happened we may not have met again if not for all this," Clare tells me after sitting silently for a while. Then she turns her head up and takes my lips in a soft but happy kiss.

"I feel the same, I'm glad I found you again although I wish we'd know what was going on sooner," I comment and take her lips again. "For now I should get you back to your room," I say when I see the time and stand up pulling her with me.

"Do you have to go? I hate hospitals can you stay in my room again?" She requests.

"Sure I can stay, I'll take you back to your room and you can get ready for bed while I clean this stuff up," I comment.

I take her down to her room clean up the stuff from the roof and go back to Clare's room. She's got her gown on and is back in bed, a nurse is hooking her back up to the IV and monitors. I wait until the nurse is done and then sit on the bed with her.

"Thanks for the date, it was very sweet and we didn't even have to leave the hospital," she grins giving me another soft kiss.

"I'll actually take you out after you're released," I comment and she smiles.

She falls asleep in my arms and on my chest again, once she's asleep I gently remove her from my arms and kiss her forehead. I take off my shoes and jeans getting into the cot they set up, actually there's two and the other is for Adam but he's sleeping at home tonight. I fall asleep listening to Clare's breathing.

**(CLARE)**

"I hope this is the end of it, I meant it when I said I didn't want to see her again," I seethe with bitter hate even thinking of my mother.

"It's her sentencing you won't have to, and we'll celebrate after," Sean tells me kissing me tenderly.

Mother's trial lasted only a couple of days but I hated seeing her, even looking at her. I couldn't forgive her terrible betrayal; I couldn't stand to be in the same room with her. It's been three months since I found out she was making me sick and until her trial started Monday I hadn't seen her at all. I have seen Glen however; he came to the Torres house after I moved in. He brought some more of my stuff and apologized for what mom did. Sean was right Glen did feel guilty; he said he should have seen it and done something or paid more attention to Mom. According to the psychologist Glen could have paid her all the attention he was able it wouldn't have helped. It was a specific kind of attention and pity Mom wanted, she liked having people listen to her and tell them how hard things were with me ill. Anyway I never blamed Glen, he's been supportive and he helped the Torres' turn the attic into a room.

Drew moved into the attic and I took his room, Adam and I now had rooms next door to each other. It was great living with my best friend, Adam and I spent countless hours in each other's rooms. I spent more time talking with him than I ever did with Alli and Jenna. It's funny Adam and I have very little in common, he's a guy, well he was born as a girl but he's always been a boy between the ears, and I've only ever known him as a boy. He likes Dead Hand, comics, sports, fighting and video games, it's no mystery why he got along with Eli so well. Adam and I do share common intellect, we're both good at school, writing and seek jobs in journalism. Yet we can talk for hours, about everything and nothing at all. We just get each other and that's why we're best friends. Our friendship is deep and we just click, we're each other's backup, you know if we're not married by forty we'll marry each other.

Of course he's happy with Becky and Sean and I are going strong. We'll be celebrating our three month anniversary in a few days. Our first date out of the hospital Sean took me dinner and then we had dessert on a cruise on the harbor and watched the stars. Sean has been wonderful; it's a little odd since he's so much older than me. We went to the Halloween dance as Snow White and Prince Charming. We had a great time and I was feeling so much better I was able to enjoy the dance and my time with Sean. His work schedule sometimes makes it hard to go out but he comes by the school a lot. He gets along with all my friends and I catch him hanging out with Owen a lot.

Jake calls every couple of weeks to check in and he'll be home next week for Christmas break. Bianca comes home as often as possible, she and Drew are quite enjoying his new room because it was sound proofed and the Torres parents can't hear what they're doing. Sean was at the trial as a witness, so were most of my friends since they'd witnessed me getting sick and could testify about it. Even Eli sent a sworn statement giving testimony about how my mother was when I was in the hospital getting chemo. My ex had also been trying to get in touch with me but I hadn't been willing until after he sent the statement. He apologized for cheating and some other stuff, I forgave him and told him I was happy with Sean and that was it.

At Mom's trial it came out that Mom had abandonment issues after the divorce and Darcy leaving, Glen working a lot. That she felt alone but then I became sick and she was getting attention and that's what triggered the Munchausen Syndrome by Proxy. None of this changed my mind about her nor did I feel sorry for her. Dad abandoned me too, Darcy left me as well and Eli cheated me and I didn't feel the need to get attention or pity. Honestly it almost made things worse I was happier when I thought my mother was just nuts. At least she's getting sentenced today, she probably won't spend much time jail but she'll have to continue with psychological treatment for a while and I've been permanently removed from her care.

I could move out on my own since I'm old enough but I don't want to. We still don't know about long term effects and there are still things I have trouble with. When the doctor ran all those tests the Monday after we'd figured out what was going on they all came back mostly okay. I still have some issues with short term memory, on occasion the last few minutes would vanish from my memory and I'd be confused. My friends and Sean were always helpful and patient with me, the doctor said it might improve but it may never improve and I was learning to cope with it. The other lasting effect was muscle spasms and weakness; they were at least getting better. Owen was working with me on muscle strengthening exercises and often Sean would work out with us. Despite this I had my appetite back, didn't have the headaches, weakness or dizziness, I wasn't fainting or having seizures or any of that so I was doing a lot better. Because of everything my body went through with cancer and chemo and then the mercury poisoning I had to go back for frequent checkups because they worried about long term and hidden effects on my body.

"She'll most likely be sentenced to several years of psychological care and a suspended sentence of a few years in prison. That's what's most common in these cases, although Munchausen by proxy is pretty rare," Omar comments.

"As long as she's out of my life," I respond as we all get out of the minivan and go into the courthouse.

We all sit down and the courtroom fills up, Mom was already found guilty today is just the sentencing. Mom comes in and the judge finally, he looks at my mom and calls the courtroom to order.

"Helen Florence Edwards you have been found guilty of child abuse and endangerment. Due to the psychological aspect this court orders you to three years of outpatient psychological care at which point you will be reevaluated. You will also serve a two prison sentence suspended for a minimum of three years and maximum of ten. Do you have anything to say?" The judge asks her.

"I didn't do anything but care for my child I wouldn't poison her!"

I turn into Sean and Mom is lead away, when she's gone I look up again. There are reporters here so I'm escorted out and we leave going home. Everyone is here including Bianca for a small celebration, there's food and lots of talking. Most of it is about Christmas plans but of course there is some talk of the trial and Mom's sentence.

"She'll be in outpatient psychological care longer than prison that doesn't seem fair," Jenna remarks.

"I'm not sure what would be fair for making me intentionally ill and playing with my life. I'm just glad she's gone," I reply.

"Yeah and you won't have to see her again," Adam says.

Sean and I talk with everyone and eat a little, when everyone starts to leave Sean and I leave too. He takes me to his apartment for some alone time.

"You know we've been dating for three months on Friday," Sean comments when we're in his apartment.

"I know and it's been an amazing three months," I smile kissing him softly.

"I thought we'd celebrate a little early, starting with these," Sean tells me producing a small box with mini cupcakes. Six cupcakes in all of all different flavors, Sean takes a chocolate one and removes the wrapper holding it to my lips and I take a bite. Sean eats the rest and picks up another cupcake; this one has pink frosting on yellow cake. I dip my finger in the frosting and hold it to Sean's mouth; he grins and happily licks the frosting from my finger. He does the same and I lick the frosting from his finger, then I lick the frosting from the cupcake and overtake Sean's lips in a passionate kiss. Sean puts his arm around my lower back and sweeps me into his lap; I deepen the kiss and then pull away feeding him the rest of the cupcake. I take the next cup cake and we eat it the same way kissing again at the end but Sean pulls away too soon. "Before we go any further I have an early Christmas present for you," he says handing me an envelope.

I open it and find two tickets to Byrncliff Resort, "We're going skiing?"

"We're going to the resort for a week; we'll leave on Boxing day and return January 2nd, if you want to that is?"

"I would love to," I grin kissing my boyfriend and very much looking forward to Christmas.

A few months ago I thought I might die; now I have a new life living with my best friend and his family. Best of all I have a wonderful boyfriend and I feel myself falling in love with him.

**So that does it for this story, it will be replaced by Devious Deceits which because it's short story month will premier Tuesday December 16****th****.**


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